The Train: It's blogger's gold

I will say this about the Train. It's great for coming up with Blogging material. You've just got to remember to jot things down somewhere. Or start moblogging. Which i'm told is slightly weird. So here's my list of bloggable things from one train journey:

It all started with this man, who was on my train. I recognised him as being the Dad from the BBC's TV apaption of "The Borrowers", but googling him for a picture just now, it turns out he was also in some film called Lord of The Rings. Okay so it might not have *actually* been him, because i can't imagine he uses the smelly south-west trains, but it sure as hell could be his evil twin. Unless he's his evil twin, in which case the guy on the train is the good twin. We've established at least, he's definitely a twin.

After that, i wanted to tell you about how hilarious it was to watch someone come flying down the station stairs, only to get to the train just as the doors close. It might have been mean and unnecessary of me to laugh, but it was still funny. And we've all been there.

The train was very crowded again from the start and although i managed to get a seat, it was next to a pregnant woman. Note to self: don't pick a seat next to a pregnant woman. Pregnant women are wider than normal, and take up an unfair amount of seat space. On the other hand, i did get to read some of her book, which was of course "baby names". There was some that brought me some amusement. I joined her as she reached "N", and she spent a disturbingly long time looking at "Norman". Poor kid. The strangest name was definitely "Odyssues", but best of all, i got to look at some alternative names for "Ralph". For anyone that know's Ralph, you can also address him as:

- Rauf
- Raul
- and.. Raoul

Congratulations, Rauf. After that, i decided i wanted to make an important observation on the over-crowding of the trains. The government are currently discussing the idea of "pay-as-you-go driving". This is where you pay an amount per-mile for the roads you use. This will effectively make driving so expensive it will force most people off the roads and on to public transport. Public transport which doesn't appear to have the capacity to support it's current passenger-load. Perhaps they'll replace all the roads with railways, and have about a thousand times more trains than they do now. Which will of course cause congestion on the rail network. Which they'll resolve by making people pay a ludicrous amount per-mile for rail travel.

I had to change at Wimbledon, on to another train with no available seats. Here i stood in the doorway bit and as the train pulled away almost fell on top of a random woman. No one found this amusing but me. Which just seemed backwards.

After that the train eventually emptied out. Turns out the only person who travels by train to my town is me. I did get to listen to one-side of another long boring mobile conversation. Oh, and i was on a brand new South-West train. It has a clever auto-announcer that tells you what the next station is. This one was clearly already bored of it's job, because it kept lying. I'm telling you once that Skynet comes online these machines are going to kill us all.